Luna Tail

I am so tense. Even on the Zoloft… even with things being so much better for me now. I find that my mind, quite often, races. And that my muscles twitch. And I really need to just relax and calm down.

When I was a kid I used to be able to fall asleep in front of the TV… I haven’t done that for years. As soon as I start to drift off, my mind starts to go over the days events, and I also try to figure things out about the future. My mind just doesn’t shut up and I’m really tired of it.

So the last week or so I’ve started a new mantra.

Listen

Instead of to any words in my head, I just listen to the world. The quiet world, the soft sounds, the breathing of my dogs… anything. Even the silence. Listening really makes me aware of my surroundings and brings me into the present moment. Instead of the future and the past, which I swear I live in more than the present.

Breathe

Then while I’m listening, I breathe deeply. I really don’t think I breathy nearly enough. My breathing is shallow and thin, and usually from the top of my chest. When I concentrate, I focus on breathing from my belly. Deep, slow breaths.

Relax

And then while I’m listening and Breathing, I try to relax. Stop my muscles from twitching, my leg from going back and forth. I try to settle down and just let myself be. Getting the tension out of my muscles is critical, I think. For my own health physically and mentally.

And although a girl’s best friends are her diamond rings, still this girl needs to relax… breathe, and listen, and calm the heck down!

On this day..

• Painting The Spare Bedroom - 2010
• Coexisting with House Mice - 2009

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