So tonight at flyball practice I got yelled at. Ugh. And I knew it was coming, because the person who did the yelling does it quite often at others. And with Chase’s pads being torn and broken, he couldn’t practice.
But you know what? I think I did well. I didn’t yell back. I was nice. However, I did feel like I had to leave. I went so I could help out, but I figured it wasn’t worth it. I don’t like to be spoken to like that. Though I understand the speaker may not be aware, or really understand, what she is doing. And I like her anyway.
So I did step away, and the tears came. But they were really weird tears. Because inside I really felt okay. I knew myself, knew how I felt, knew what I had to do to take care of myself… I talked to some of the other girls, off to the side, who had already been yelled at, and commiserated with them a bit. 
I could laugh about it even while the tears were running out my eyes.
I’ve learned a lot over the last few years. I really like my friends I have in flyball now, and agility, and I’m so glad I’m doing this. No one that hasn’t experienced Anxiety can understand the thrill I feel that I actually have friends. Now that makes me cry. I mean look at me… I’m actually out there, taking the risk of getting yelled at, and making friends, even with my social and general anxiety. So really, tonight was a good step for me. It was an affirmation that I am doing what I want to do, handling it (okay not really too well, but I know that about myself), and moving on.
Woo Hoo.
So even though it was stressful, it was okay. And I came home early with the boys and am letting Chase rest, because the dogs are my number one priority.
On this day..
- Make Me Over! - 2008
- I'll Eat 'Till I'm Sick - 2008
All I can say is, it takes a real man to stand up to that. Way to go…
All I can say is, it takes a real man to stand up to that. Way to go…
Interesting blog you have here.
Dogs are my favourite animals. I used to have a St. Bernard a few years back. I loved that guy to bits. He’s since passed away. I havent been able to find another like him!!!
cyberst0rm’s tech blog
http://cyberst0rm.blogspot.com
Interesting blog you have here. Dogs are my favourite animals. I used to have a St. Bernard a few years back. I loved that guy to bits. He's since passed away. I havent been able to find another like him!!! cyberst0rm's tech blog http://cyberst0rm.blogspot.com
Thanks Morocco Travel.
I’m not a man, but I have balls.. errr… lol well ya know what i mean. 
Thanks Morocco Travel.
I'm not a man, but I have balls.. errr… lol well ya know what i mean. 
Hy Cyberst0rm, no two dogs are completely alike. I love how diverse and unique they all are.
Hy Cyberst0rm, no two dogs are completely alike. I love how diverse and unique they all are.
Way to handle the situation with style & grace, I wouldn’t have done near as well.
Way to handle the situation with style & grace, I wouldn't have done near as well.
Thanks Sarakastic. I’m really a pansy at heart. It’s easier for me to run and hide. I almost yelled back, but checked myself.
Thanks Sarakastic. I'm really a pansy at heart. It's easier for me to run and hide. I almost yelled back, but checked myself.
Way to go Cynthia! I totally understand what you mean about how cool it is to have friends. I have been trying to make friends for years and its hard. Some people are so rude and insensitive! You’ve got lots of people that care about you though including all your online friends!
Take Care,
Aimee
Way to go Cynthia! I totally understand what you mean about how cool it is to have friends. I have been trying to make friends for years and its hard. Some people are so rude and insensitive! You've got lots of people that care about you though including all your online friends! Take Care, Aimee
Hi Aimee, thanks for your support.
It really is hard to make friends, to find people we really fit with. But they are out there.
Hi Aimee, thanks for your support.
It really is hard to make friends, to find people we really fit with. But they are out there.